Koppel HUNGRY!

If you are a gourmand, gourmet, epicure, bon viveur, or simple glutton, there are many fine restaurants which you will enjoy in Boston and several terrible ones which will leave you sobbing over the wasted time and expense. Some uncategorised and meandering reviews:

Avoid Aujourd’hui at the Four Seasons, it’s overpriced, needlessly snooty, and not particularly good. Most of the steakhouses are B-grade at best. Do try the simple authenticity of Moby Dick, the oddly named Persian restaurant, recently updated to include. . . menus. Cash only but worth the trouble. Incidentally, the website is unintentionally hilarious. Take my parents, tell Moti I sent you. She won’t remember my name but will tell you what you want to eat. Don’t try to argue.

Nathanael and I are particularly fond of Hamersley’s Bistro in the South End. Oh, and Chelsea loves it, too. Not as expensive as you might expect, superb food. Avoid the similarly reputable Aquitaine. In a similar French vein, Brasserie Jo has a great people-watching scene, including soloists and conductors of the BSO, and excellent brasserie fare. That is to say, cocktails, carrots, and dessert.

Don’t try to eat on Newbury Street. It’s frustrating, silly, and almost invariably third-rate.
The North End, however, is a fun, touristy area, with lots of red-sauce Italian-American cuisine, nice little shops – open later than 5PM – and proximity to the ocean. Get away from the main drag, Hanover street, and explore! You may even find the occasional first-rate Tuscan meal.

Do, however, try the excellent – and near to the church and hotels – Elephant Walk at 900 Beacon Street in Boston. Cambodian and French food, which have flirted shamelessly for years, served nicely and with menu options for vegetarians and the tofu-avoidant alike.

Indian food in Boston is a bit tricky. The best I’ve had is at Rani in Brookline, which claims to be an Indian Bistro, whatever that might be. Attention marketing gurus: Proper bistros allow dogs. Proper Indians do not allow dogs near their food. A bit more South Indian and therefore better for you is Tanjore in Harvard (well, Brattle) Square.

Speaking of cocktails, which we weren’t, Boston has been in the vanguard of those reviving great cocktails of the past. I would be remiss in not mentioning the bar at Eastern Standard in Kenmore Square. Superb cocktails made by a bartender of rare skill. Have a sazerac, have a pisco sour, a gin flip, a Pegu club, and Tom Collins, but don’t expect me to carry you home. Avoid the food, though; overpriced and not particularly good. Excellent cocktails are also available at the old-fashioned Oak Room, with marble on the walls, jazz played softly, and a bucket of ice to keep your gargantuan, brain-befuddling martini cold.

I don’t know why Boston’s steakhouses are so bad. Yeah, you can go to a big chain like Ruth Chris or Morton’s, and clog your arteries with filet deep-fried, but why? The steaks are lukewarm from the heating lamp, the vegetables bedraggled, and the wine overpriced. The best I’ve been to here is the old Capital Grille which is a classic in the old tradition of Boston steakhouses. I had a lovely tenderloin on the bone which I still remember fondly.

Strangely enough, Malden has two fine destinations, authentic Szechuan at Fu Loon and nice, stylish pan-Asian at All Seasons Table on Pleasant Street, next to a dollar store and two abandoned storefronts. It’s worth going just for the cognitive dissonance of hipness in Malden.

Please, for the love of God, Mary, Jesus, and Tim, avoid the Faneuil Hall/Quincy Market area. The food is bad, the parking is bad, the service is horrific, and it’s full of drunken louts.

There is superb sushi at Fugakyu in Coolidge Corner, nearish to the church. The same owner’s East Ocean City is an old favourite. Don’t order King Crab without asking the price, though.

L’espalier is supposed to be the best French restaurant in Boston. I was whelmed.

The pretty lady at top right took me to Ten Tables which was one of the better meals I’ve had in some time. Let them do a tasting menu of food and wine for you, and you’ll wind up with superb pairings.

Blue Ribbon Barbeque in Arlington is quite nice, civilised, orderly, and yet also somehow capable of providing good food.

An old and constantly renewed favourite is Taberna de Haro, around the corner from the church and consistently superior both in service and execution.

Sandrine’s, an actual Bistro in Cambridge, is a lovely place for a low-key, high-quality meal. Our best beloved pastry chef, Lee Napoli, done runoff’t and made her own place, Chocolee Chocolates in the South End. She – and her chocolates – are superb.

Many people have recommended these restaurants to me but I haven’t gotten around to trying them yet. I also haven’t gotten around to looking up their websites:
No. 9 Park, Lumière, Craigie St. Bistrot, Harvest, Blue Ginger, O Ya, Clio, Radius, Oleana (sounds like that fake fat from the late 90’s. . . what was it?), Mistral, Rialto, Toro, (ten or so other places with one-word names), Locke-Ober, The Butcher Shop, and Via Matta.